Square One

Letters to the Editor from the Politically Perfect

Dear the square,
As an angry feminist, I object to your monthly feature, “Ins and Outs.” This section of your publication is offensive, as it encourages the importance of staying “In,” because really, who would want to be “Out”? I speak here not just in terms of the latest fashions, but also with possible readers who might be in “The Closet.” Please consider your more marginalized readers in your editing process.
Love,
Angry Feminist

Dear the square,
Upon writing my last letter to the editor, I realized that not only am I personally offended by the monthly feature “Ins and Outs,” but I also take issue with the ideology of binaries which this section of the publication perpetuates. Today our world is plagued with dualisms (chocolate vs. vanilla, Four Lokos vs. remembering Saturdays, male vs. female, black vs. white, right vs. wrong) which do not serve us. They only, well, divide us. I defend here anyone who has been forced into one end of a dichotomy or another (into a box, a square one might even say!) by unrelenting messages of conformity from society. As a people, we should not have to choose between Chat Roulette or LikeALittle.com; we should be able and encouraged to enjoy both. Please consider the damage on our society you are preserving by continuing to publish “Ins and Outs.”
-Really Angry Feminist

Dear the square,
The title of your publication, “The Square” clearly excludes all other shapes. What about circles? Hexagons? Parallelograms and Trapezoids? Have mercy, man, and for the sake of geometry, at least attempt to be more inclusive! Hmpf.
-Hub Box 2160

Dear Politically Perfect,
You’re right. the square has, until now, been unbearably insensitive. the euclidean geometry, which is the name our publication will henceforth be known by, would therefore like to roll out our new section to replace “Ins and Outs.”
It is my pleasure to present our newest feature:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

With love,
Brett Cassette
square editor-in-chief

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